Tuesday, March 23, 2010

March 23

On certain days of the year, we light candles in our house. These are days when we lost someone that we loved.

Today, March 23rd, Meazi lit a candle of her own. She waved Melese over and said, "Come Melese, this is for you too."

These two small beings have changed my life so much. I love them more than I ever thought possible. I feel like I knew nothing about life until I met them.

Their sadness is my sadness.

They are the holders of my heart.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

In Like A Lion...



March.

Meazi has had a couple of 'just home' behavior days; tantrums, meltdowns, and sleep disruptions. These seemed so out of place. Meazi has been so content for the last couple of months. The intensity of these 'off' days caused me to remark, "I wonder if it is an anniversary of something for her?" Many, many, of the adoptive moms on our old adoption agency forum used to post that their children had a very hard time on anniversaries of certain events (i.e. The day they were brought to the orphanage, the day they left Ethiopia etc).

I paused to remember what might have happened to Meazi and Melese around this time.

March.

I looked through my own calendar from last year. It is pretty empty.

Back before we had a referral, I remember during the waiting, when I had had a particularly hard day, friends would say, "Maybe your children are going through something." I always brushed this off as ridiculous. How could I possibly be feeling something for children I knew nothing about?

One day last March, I woke up horribly sad. It was more than a depressed feeling. I had a sadness so deep, and I had no idea where it was coming from. I knew it was not about me. Something external was happening. I felt so much despair. I went over to my calendar and scribbled the word tragic on the day's date. I knew something was happening to my future children whose names and story I had yet to learn. Tragic. I felt it.

In our referral information we found out that within forty-eight hours of that day, the tragedy that caused our children to be put up for adoption occurred.

March was a really bad month for Meazi and Melese.

I am hoping that March goes out like a lamb.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Two Trips

I don't have any time today, and I am having computer issues, but I just wanted to send out a word of support to those families who are getting new hoops to jump through. I know as a woman firmly perched on the other side it is easy for me to say that it will be worth it, but...

It will be worth it.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Tortuga in Spring

Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.

For, lo! the winter is past, the rain is over and gone;

The flowers appear on the earth; The time of the singing of birds is come,


And the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Peter's Chair


The hours after nap up until bedtime can be a bit challenging, especially if I don't plan something in advance. I noticed that Meazi just naturally goes for a book when she gets up. I am finding that the M&m Storytelling hour serves as a nice transition to our late afternoon activities.

Here is one of Meazi's favorites...



And a Meazi original...



Happy Friday.

(Oh and Shiri from Brooklyn, please send me your e-mail address!)

Monday, March 1, 2010

Trouble

Yes, that is my son wearing his sister's tutu.

Recently, Ruth and Aster's mom posted about meeting Jane Kurtz. (I didn't know who to be more jealous of, Katy for meeting Jane Kurtz, or Jane for meeting Katy and the twins).

There is a new version of Jane's book Trouble. It is a bilingual version (English and Amharic), and all of the proceeds continue to go to Ethiopia Reads.

Also, did you know that Jane Kurtz has a blog?

It seems that for about 10k you can sponsor your own library in Ethiopia.

I'd like to put one here, in the area where my kids are from.

In other news, Ms. M continues her campaign for a trip to see Dr. LaBootie...

She said she'd like to go for her fifth birthday.


She's really laying it on thick...