File Under... WTF?

We had a lovely day today. We attended a beach birthday party for a beautiful boy and his incredibly nice family. Enamored with the day, we decided to extended it by purchasing day passes to the beach's adjacent community pool. Before entering I had the kiddos wash the sand off themselves at the outdoor shower.

Meazi and Melese walked to the spigot that has several shower heads. Showering next to them was a young girl around four.

Upon seeing Meazi and Melese, said four-year old girl fled frantically from the shower shouting, "Momma! They're brown! Why are they brown?! Momma, are they sunburned?"

Really Westside Whitey McWhiterson family?  Really? This is the first person of color your four-year old has seen?

You need to get out more. You need to show your kid that not everybody is white.

WTF?

Meazi and Melese just gave me a look, your basic WTF look.

This is Los Angeles! I mean where do we have to go?

WTF?

Spit Camp Update

The camp update is not very interesting. After the morning conversation with CC, I received a message on my voicemail at 12:40 pm. CC's voicemail said that the boy had been picked up, and had "spent the morning in the office away from the other campers doing other activities." He also said that he would miss the following day of camp as well.

At that point I didn't care what had happened to the boy. I thought that the camp rule calling for an immediate suspension for spitting was quite severe, but assumed they had it for a reason and since we signed a contract agreeing to the rules, I thought the rules should be enforced.  More than anything else, I was still shocked that a camp counselor had lied to my face in front of a bunch of impressionable kiddos.

When I picked up Meazi, the counselor was not outside. Meazi plopped into her seat and said, "Mom, that boy was sent home. Did CC call you to tell you he wasn't a liar?" I said that he called to tell me the kid's mom had picked him up. "And did he tell you that he is not a liar? He wanted you to know that he wasn't lying. He thought the little brother had just been dropped off." I looked at her face and she looked so worried. There is a tiny possibility that this could have happened, I guess. It is extremely doubtful. I tried to discuss it a little more with Meazi until she said, "Mom, how many days do we have to continue talking about this?" I mentioned that the boy would not be present on Thursday either and she said, "Oh, that's because he stepped on someone's head. Also, his brother told me their parents grounded him for two weeks for spitting in my face."

Not wanting to make her five day camp experience completely about this kid and his behavior problems, and this counselor with questionable truth telling abilities, I have kind of let it go, sort of. There is a very slight possibility the CC didn't see the kid until after he talked to me, very slight possibility. Shouldn't I give him the benefit of the doubt?

I know that he lied. But my kid believes him. She is visibly worried that I won't believe him.

That night Steven was working out back on a construction project for our kitchen. Melese came running in from outside and said, "Momma! Daddy is lying! He said that I have his tape measure and then he just found it in his own pocket! Daddy lied to me just like that man lied to you!"

At least Melese knows what really happened.

Here's Spit in Your Eye!

Meazi started a one week camp this past Monday. The camp is at a cool place that rescues all types of animals. Yesterday a fellow second grader, on his way to the water fountain, turned and spit into Meazi's face. When I arrived to pick Meazi up, a camp counselor told me about it and said, "I wanted you to know for when it comes up at the dinner table."

I don't think Meazi would have even mentioned it to me as she had big stories to share about feeding two large turtles and an exotic lizard.

I asked her if the boy was vanilla or chocolate. "Vanilla," she said. The camp counselor had assured me the boy's parents would be notified. I read a behavior agreement that Meazi and I both had to sign on the first day. The rules state that spitting is an immediate suspension.

This morning I dropped Meazi off and asked the counselor if we could talk again about what happened. Here is our conversation:

Me: So I am wondering about the spitting incident yesterday, were the boy's parents notified? The rules we signed Monday call for a suspension for the boy.

Camp Counselor: Yes, they were notified and he was sent home yesterday.

Me: Meazi said he was here all day.

CC: He was sent home at the end of the day. We called his mom to pick him up at 3:00.

Me:  Camp ends at 3:00.

CC: Well he is not allowed to come today.

Me: Oh, he was suspended?

CC: Yes, his little brother was allowed to come today, but he was not. His little brother has been dropped off.

Me: Ok. Thanks.

I walked over to Meazi to say goodbye. I said to her, "So Meazi, that boy was suspended today for spitting in your face. He will not be allowed to come today."

Meazi: Mom, he's sitting right there, next to the counselor you were just talking to.

Me: Are you sure? He has a little brother, are you sure that is not his little brother?

Meazi: Mom, I am sure. That is Tony, the boy who spit in my face.

I saw Tony get up from the table and I walked over to the camp counselor.

Me: Meazi says that he is the boy who spit on her. What is his name?

CC: Tony.

Me: Yes. That is him.

CC: Uh, yeah, uhm I sent him to the office.

Me: You just told me he was not here today.

CC: I've just sent him to the office, and we are going to call his mom and tell her he can't be here today.

Me: So what you just told me five minutes ago was untrue?

CC: Well, uh, his little brother is here.

Me: ???

CC: He will be sent home.

Me: I'm sorry. I don't understand? Has his mom been told of the incident?

CC: Yeah, uhm, he is in the office now, I am on my way there too.

Growing Pains

Meazi is having growing pains, literally. Her shins hurt. I have to buy new clothes and shoes for her all of the time. I am now an Ebay shopper, bidding late into the night on used Naartjie leggings. I wake up in the morning and do an Ebay walk of shame over to my laptop, half hoping my rash overbidding has been outbid by someone who likes Naartjie more than me. I am working on her back to school wardrobe. I keep an eye open for butterflies, and purple, and 100% cotton.

She just had her last day of a month long summer program. Originally I had her in the Spanish Immersion class. She was miserable, so I switched her to art. We now have tons of painted toilet paper rolls, and decorative switch plate covers filling our rooms. She liked art. I was happy that the program was so diverse. Today, her last day, she told me all sorts of stories about her racist classmates. There was a boy who told her she was disgusting the very first week. She had mentioned it when it happened, but what she didn't tell me was that he said, "You are disgusting. Black people are disgusting." A second student told her that "Chocolate people were stupid". In both instances, Meazi spoke to the child and then to her teacher. The kids were reprimanded. Steven said the problem with all of this diversity is that this diversity apparently involves skinheads too. All are welcome. Meazi, surprising me with her strong sense of self, and her brave sense of right and wrong, believes these kids are wrong, and sad, and bullies. She feels sorry for them that they don't see how beautiful chocolate is, and how a mixed family is special. She knows to gravitate toward the students that agree with her.

I am watching her grow up. Her length astonishes me. The family bed is getting more and more cramped. She is tall and strong.

On our way to class one morning she said, "Mom, we should really get back to the zoo. It looks like on July 9th there will be a new Los Angeles zookeeper." She was looking up at a billboard for this movie. It had a Coming on July 9th banner on it. I loved this so, so, much when she said it. I love that she doesn't understand movies, or billboards, or who Kevin James is.

This moment, as I am writing this, she is sitting next to me braiding her doll's hair and asking me if I like Lady Gaga. She is wearing her new underwear I bought her at Target today, and her butterfly backpack, and nothing else. In the backpack are her doll's clothes. She says that she and her baby Sarah are traveling to North Ecuador to visit Sarah's mom. She says that she adopted Sarah, but that it wasn't because of a sad reason like her adoption. She says, 'Sarah's moms are both living".

"I think Lady Gaga is a wizard. Do you think so mom?"

I'm not sure Meazi. I'm not sure.

Strangeness at the Souplantation

Can't we just eat too much at the all-you-can-eat salad bar in peace?

Woman #1 approaches our table:

"Oh, what a beautiful family. You are from South Africa?"

(Is there a period of South African history that I missed?)

Older Man #1 approaches our table:

"What a beautiful family. I just look at his big brown eyes and do you know who I am immediately reminded of?"

(I shake my head bracing myself for the worst).

"Buckwheat! He looks just like cute little Buckwheat!"