I am a little worried that I am going to get a call from my social worker after yesterday's post (which I wouldn't mind because I miss her). Thank you for all of the advice and support. You guys are amazing. Let me be clear, things are 75% great. I just wanted people who are about to do this to know that parts of it will be challenging. It is mostly Keep on Truckin', and most of my tears are tears of joy.Speaking of tears of Joy. Liz needs to work on her Amharic.
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ReplyDeleteI appreciate you sharing the "nitty gritty" with us. Seems much more realistic and will let me know I am not alone when I go through this.
ReplyDeleteYou inspire and help many!
Keep on truckin', Julie, keep on truckin'.
ReplyDeleteYou don't know how helpful your post was for me (and Bill). I need to buckle down and get ready for my life to be rocked upside down. I can't wait for the shake up, but I need to be realist about it.
ReplyDeletexoxo
Evelyn
I just read your previous post. I love it when people are honest about it. It's so helpful. But, I felt the same way about not wanting to moan when people were still waiting. And - the confusion as a mom about normal toddler stuff and adoption related stuff - yep, relating. Anyway - I just wanted to thank you for your honesty.
ReplyDeleteI knew things were pretty good - look at M's silver sparkle shoes! Hello - LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL! With those shoes, truckin' is going to be an adventure!
ReplyDeleteYou know, one of my first thoughts WAS "gotta crack open the Amharic books again"!
ReplyDeletedon't worry. people know that the occasional post where you let the ugly truth slip out a bit doesn't mean that you are suffering all the time, or that things are terrible. All of us in this thing know what you are going through... It's mostly good for everyone, but the bad stuff is still hard, and the hard days can feel really really hard.
ReplyDeletekeep on posting without filtering. :-)
You have always kept it real for us, Julie and that's one of the many, many reasons I keep reading, and so value you and your perspective, and your wisdom. This is hard, it will be hard, and it will also be wonderful and joyful. Your kids are lucky to have such a thoughtful, deep, and fun mom~ the hard parts make the good parts even better. ~Alex
ReplyDeleteHI! I was reading your last few post and know what its like to not know how to respond to these new kids. I want to pass on some info to you that really helped us. We were experiencing the same things and we found this bonding and attachment group that made an amazing difference in our daughter. Check out www.attachment.org and I held my little gal in a sling for weeks during this time. Check out www.loveyduds.com. Blessings on your new family
ReplyDeleteJulie,
ReplyDeleteThis path with older kids is not easy. I am barely keeping my own head above water and it's hard for me to blog or respond. You are doing just fine, and it's a vastly complicated situation (from the ET trip to wondering if your kid should really be eating so much) that is hard to explain unless you've been in it. I don't think you could have been more prepared for the onslaught. This is a time of relentlessness. I am only a few months ahead of you and my daughter is a bit older, but I will say that many things have become easier, although changes like school bring setbacks. Giving in to how my live looks right now and not thinking I should be doing anything else has helped. Most of the time, I think I am treading water.
What to share on the blog is complicated -- sometimes I think my stuff is a little impersonal but it seems to help my friends and family so I keep at it.
Martha
Julie,
ReplyDeleteRaising two kids that age is tough even when it's without the additional complications of adoption/loss of culture/grief, etc. We are waiting to adopt from Ethiopia, too, and we have two birth children ages 4 and 6. It's easier now than it was when they were 1 and 3. I remember thinking it was SO HARD and I had been able to come into it more gradually...first one kid, then a few years later a second one. I am a reader, a preparer, a researcher (okay, I'm anal), and I thought I was so ready to be a parent. Truthfully, I was as ready as I could have been, and it has still been SO MUCH harder than I ever imagined it would be. It's much much harder than the high-powered career I used to have. Much. And again, I got into it more gradually and didn't have to cope with the issues of attachment, grief, language barrier, etc. Your posts are really helpful to me. Keep the truth coming!
Julie,
ReplyDeleteYour blog has been so beautiful to read when I occasionally check in. I hope you remember me, this is Michele Downing (now Michalski) from Lincolnshire. I just wanted you to know that you have made my eyes leak with some of your posts. You are an exquisite writer! I can't tell you how happy I am for you and your husband, and your gorgeous children. You have been through such a challenging journey, and it sounds like you still face a lot of road bumps, but your love shows with everything you do. Congratulations from the bottom of my heart. If you want to reach me, you can find me on Facebook or you can email me at michba@earthlink.net . I would love to hear from you!
Michele