Thursday, April 17, 2008

Top Six Reasons My Birthday Was Better Than The Pope's...

Yesterday, Pope Benedict and I shared a birthday. We were both born on April 16th, 1927. Here are the top six reasons why my birthday was better than the Pope's.

Reason Number 6...


Although Pope Benedict had a big, beautiful cake, it seems that it was more decorative and that he didn't actually eat it.

Here is my cake...

Here is my cake, three and a half minutes later...

I mean really, what good is a cake if you don't get to eat it?

Reason Number Five...


Steven and I went for a hike. If you really want to feel your age on your birthday, put your rickety body through a five mile climb in the mid-day heat. This hike seemed a lot easier one year ago. When we finally reached our destination we took our bench's advice.

The Pope, however, had a very stressful day; crowds, protests- not very relaxing.

Reason Number Four...


Here is the menu for the Pope's Birthday dinner:

Morel-encrusted diver scallops, ramp spatzle, angel hair asparagus bisque, duo of veal, white truffle potato dumplings, baby carrots and boletus mushrooms, heirloom lettuces and candied pumpkin seeds, spring squash carpaccio, styrian pumpkin oil vinaigrette, raspberry crisp and mint coulis.

Sounds good right? Well guess what...

"His Holiness will skip the dinner in his honor. Pope Benedict won’t be on hand for the big White House dinner tonight marking his visit."

What? A Birthday dinner without the Birthday Pope? What gives?

He should have come to Mao's with us...

Delicious. And at my age, the early bird special provides all of this and more, for under 10 bucks a person.

Reason Number Three...


A tasteful bouquet from a friend, lovely. If you receive acres and acres of flowers, the smell becomes downright overwhelming, some would even say nauseating.

The Pope probably never receives birthday gifts he really likes. No one really knows his size or where to purchase those fancy vestments. No one, for instance, would probably ever think to get him his very own beautiful, personalized green glass...

The "J" glass. Steven said there were some "B"'s available, and also a couple of "P"s.

Reason Number Two...


Oh sure , the Pope may have a really cool hat and a souped up Pope Mobile,

But the pope is also celibate. Enough said.

And the Number One Reason my birthday was better than the Pope's...


The pope had to spend his birthday with this man...

I got to spend mine with these guys...

My favorite part of this whole day was lifting my hike heavy head from my sunny napping place and seeing this...

My wonderful husband picking a plump, juicy loquat off of our tree, peeling it, de-seeding it and feeding it to our dogs. Birthday perfection.

So your Holiness, if on April 16th, you find yourself in the states again, please give us a call. We'll show you how to celebrate a birthday.

I am Lucky.


  1. Best.Post.Ever. Wish I could have been there for all the fun.

  2. Most hilarious post of ALL time. This deserves to be in the blogger hall of fame.

  3. Happy Belated Birthday! I don't even know what a loquat is, but it sounds like a lovely vision. If I were the pope, I would be really jealous. I'm jealous.

  4. Once again, HAPPY BIRTHDAY my friend. Look forward to celebrating (in person) in a couple of weeks!


  5. Happy Birthday!!! Mine is also the 16th -- but of a different month. It's a good day!

  6. Of course the hike was harder this year—you can't expect to still have the stamina of an 80-year-old at your age.

    Happy birthday! I agree: In all ways, you've got it better than the pope.

    I wish I had some tree advice for you, but I'm a total novice. I'd call the folks at Trees of Antiquity; they were very helpful to us. Also, the photo on our blog is a stolen web image—our trees still look like spindly little saplings (with great ambitions).

  7. You are cracking me up - "celibacy"... no further explanation required! What a wonderful birthday.

    What IS a loquat? And where do I get one to peel for Bob Laurence!?!?


  8. Happy late birthday! This post was hilarious!

  9. Happy Birthday to you!
    This past cracks me up. You guys do birthdays right.
    The pope is gonna read this and be so depressed he may leave early!

  10. pope shmope-
    i loved this post and the progression of photographs- your effort paid off. that dinner looked really, really good, and the cake. much better than the popey version.

    ps. i have noticed that your word verifications have gotten very long- nine letters! are you just trying to see how awake we are? is it some sort of test? i totally flunked the name a million states in africa one from not long ago :(